I guess you haven't experienced life until you experienced asking for something so desperately and not getting it in spite of everything, but you did know before and that you were not going to get it anyway and all you're doing is just wishful thinking; and loving something so dearly but in the end it fails you (literally) because you knew you were just not working hard enough on it. I learned these things the hard way when I earned my first 0.0 in Logic aka CRITHIN. Yep, that was my very first. I love (and I still do) this subject so much maybe that's why I was bit disappointed and hurt when I learned that I was going to fail it. It seems unfair but I learned that your love for something is useless unless you work extremely hard on it. Because of my love for this subject I took it not very seriously since I thought that it wasn't going to fail me, but it did. Hmm, so what're the odds of that? Now, I wasn't born yesterday to repeat the same mistakes I already did. Everyone knows that's just plain dumb. I just learned that I had to learn the hard way to make me see things in a new light. Heck, you don't see me wallowing in my sorrow and crying my eyes out over things like these... Well, ok I did cry but I didn't make it obvious. I just made it look like I was sleeping. Only The Barneys knew I was crying but they ignored and let me be instead of making a scene. That's good you know? Letting the person be until that person's ready or something instead of bugging that person to death making things worst. God! Why the hell would you want people asking you what's the matter and all that sit pretending that they care. Sometimes I ignore my friends when they cry. I really don't like consoling people since I'm born cold and uncaring and I'm not good at it anyway. But it doesn't mean I don't cry I almost cry everyday in fact. I cry over things that many people find absurd and trivial like the sight of street children (sometimes they make me cry other times they're just annoying), the sight of really old people working hard, homeless, unpleasant looking, beaten to a pulp animals, commercials about family, happy endings, sad endings, the death of a favourite character (games, anime etc), beautiful music and scenery or art and a whole lot more. I'm still human after all. I still feel, although sometimes very little or none at all. So I'm not so unfeeling after all. I am not ashamed to shoe people that I cry for tings like these. It doesn't show that you're weak but it shows that you care (Sounds like something anyone would hear from a diaper commercial xDD). But when it comes to serious personal problems I don't show it to people they'll just be bugging you and or all you know they're going to tell the whole neighbourhood about it. Going back I have nothing against people who wants to console others, I for one think it's a noble deed you're doing for the one you care about. And since I am born cold uncaring there are very few people I care about. There are many who I met in my lifetime but not all of them made an impact on me so why should I waste my time caring about people so insignificant to me? Honestly, I'm only nice to people so that they can be nice to me too. I mean who isn't? Like the Bible said "Do unto others what you want you others to do to you." So everyone in this world is in a give and take relationship. And I guess no one is naturally nice (except for Mother Theresa) you are to that person or that person expects something from you or vice versa. If that's the case it sounds perfectly natural to me. But is it when we do nice things we get this fuzzy feeling inside of us? I guess it's just another mystery of the world and our body. =_=

I just finished watching Season 2 Episode 11 or 10 of Heroes and me and my brother are cursing each other because it was so..... How do you say "bitin" in English? Whatever. We were already on the part where [SPOILER WARNING:] Adam Monroe showed himself to Peter Petrelli after Hiro got back from 1670 Japan teaching "Takezo Kensei" aka Adam Monroe how to be the Hero Hiro knew he was. Apparently Hiro going back to 1670 Using his Time/Space Continuum bending power was the cause of everything. It turns out that Adam has a power, same power as Claire Benett; Rapid Cell Regeneration. And when Hiro and Adam were fighting the tent exploded, Hiro escaped using his teleportation, but Adam wasn't so lucky, or wasn't he. After I saw what happened to Adam. I asked my brother. "Claire has the same power as him, right? So does that mean Claire won't die or grow old?" Very dumb question I know but you're in a moment where your so engulfed with everything that's happening that you just had to make sure that you're on the right track. I just found out that Nathan Petrelli didn't die, how is that? I remembered he flew with Peter when he was about to explode and then they exploded into space. Oh well I love Heroes~! Too bad Isaac Mendez died. I love his power being able to paint the future. I know Peter can copy other people's powers but when Isaac is the one using it, it just looks so cool. It turns out that Tim Kring creator of Heroes is planning to make 5 seasons and I'm going to wait for all of them. I just love Masi Oka aka Hiro Nakamura, he just plays Hiro so well. God, he's so cute when he concentrates. And oh, I like Gabriel "Sylar" Gray too, not his power but his face, he looks like Clark Kent when he's wearing his glasses. >.<.

Now, that I have nothing else to watch for marathons and nothing else to play, I returned to my old routine watching my favourite channel: Home Shopping Network. Isn't it amazing how they show you products you never knew you needed until you finally see them? My friends that is the power... of man's curiosity. I bet you've never even thought you needed to put gems in your clothing until you finally saw "Gem Magic for a special TV introductory offer of only 3195 pesos, that's right not 5000, not 4000 and not even 3000 you can get this amazing product at only 3195. But wait there's still more if you call within the next 30 minutes we'll throw in a free hamster poster so you and your children can stare at this wonderful creature. A $20 value yours absolutely free. So what are you waiting for? Call... RIGHT NOW~!" I have to admit I am convinced that I needed useless things like that. I don't know. I guess that's how my mind works. I am always attracted to useless things for some strange reason. Well I don't care, I like useless things.

Christmas is only 11 days away but I don't feel it, because I can feel it in my tendons that no one's going to give me money. Growing up sucks. I need MONEY~!

There have been a lot of things I am waiting for these days and I'm getting very impatient by the minute, like: I can't wait another day for the Open Beta of Secret of Solstice which will be someday this December which adds to the tension since I don't know when it's going to be and then there's the start of Open Beta for ASDA Story which will be on the 15th, I've already gotten tired of playing Trickster and Scions of Fate since it's so slow when leveling-up. It's not because I'm unskilled but it's really that way. And then I can't wait for the end of the second trimester which will be on Monday. I can't believe it's so early. Hahaha. But I won't tell my mom because I want her to give me my whole week's allowance so that I can buy those suspender I saw on Moi Bien. I'm evil I know. Then there's Christmas. Well there's nothing to look forward to that since my mom told me that no one's going to give me money since I'm already old. It sucks growing up.